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Armenian Prostitutes Confused By Street Trade Ban

ArmComedy -- Hundreds of lonely men remain unsatisfied, Kiev-Yerevan flight is on the verge of cancellation and that is just the tip of the iceberg. Recent ban of street trade by new Yerevan mayor Karen Karapetyan raised a strong waive of protests among vendors of fruits, sunglasses, flowers, bubble-gum and random crap. While street vendors picket Yerevan City hall and demand justice, one group of street vendors remains confused.

Yerevan prostitutes haven’t worked for the past week, trying to decide whether to join the street vendors or to continue working under the risk of being fined.“Prostitution is generally unwelcome by the Armenian legislation, yet we’ve worked on streets for years, right in the center of Yerevan and nobody seemed to arrest us because we had our ways of satisfying the needs the right people. Banning the street trade was a cheap blow (no pun intended) and we don’t know what to do next “ – said Prostitutes Union spokesperson Susanna “Sugar Lips” Simonyan.

“I’m a law abiding person. The day authorities started requiring receipts, I was the first to buy a cash register and provide receipts to my clients. Everyone seemed happy, especially tourists on business trips, since they’d cover their expenses under “tasting local cuisine” budge line.” – told Armishka, a 43 year old veteran of the business.

The suspense on prostitution already caused a chain reaction and harmed a number of very legal businesses. Taxi night shifts, motels, saunas, pharmacies as well as mini skirt and pantyhose import are becoming less and less profitable.

"I don't care if I cause a few heart attacks pulling a daytime shift"

Some of transsexuals hookers are ready for more drastic measures: “Our office is right next to the Mayor’s office, is this a proper way to treat neighbors? If the ban on street trade continues we’ll start showing up near City Hall at daytime too, demonstrating our protest and scaring the crap out of children and seniors.” – assured Arshaluys.

The prostitution community is willing to negotiate, if necessary develop new discount packages for law-enforcers and tax service, do open door days every week as long as they are allowed to carry on their street trade. If their conditions are not met the street girls (in some cases street boys) will be forced to continue their work at home.


All characters, countries, organizations, events mentioned in materials are purely fictional. Any resemblance is a sheer coincidence.

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